John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

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If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

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sometimes when im bored i dress in white pour water on the ground and roll around in it and pretend im a papertowel

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Whats worst then finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaus.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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"Knock knock." "Come in."

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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black people

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What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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wenis

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penis

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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