what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

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Roses are red, violets are blue Charcoal is black, and so is my neighbor

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? several.

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Asians look like they have down syndrome.

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Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

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Your mom is so old she is significantly more identifiable in a crowd of middle-aged men and women.

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Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? hes retarded.

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Some parents named their sons: Who, What and Where. Many people were left confused as to the couple's decision, and some remarked that the sons would likely get picked on in their early school years.

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whats an aids victims last wish not to have aids

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

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What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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Whats worse than having a worm in your apple? Having one in your intestins.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

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your momma so fat, that she secretly crys every night, because she is so self concious about her weight. and has to talk to a therapist because shes bolemic and has suicidal thoughts, because she cant stand the way she looks

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The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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