Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

A blond and his wife were in the hospital expecting their first child together. The wife gives birth to twins and the husband turns to her and says, "I can't believe we had twins. I'm so happy!"

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

willam dafoe

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

What do you call a broken boomarang? A stick.

Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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