Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dishes Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke

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What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

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What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

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My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

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Why did the little girl with no arms an legs cry? Because she fell off the swing.

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Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

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Hello.

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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What happens when you forget your parachute as you jump out of a plane? You wake up.

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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