A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

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What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

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Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

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There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

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What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

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If a chicken and a half layed an egg and a half in a day and a half how many pancakes does it take to shingle a roof? -A banana has no bones

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Why don't you answer the damn door and find out for yourself?

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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Barman says to a horse at the bar ' Are you sad or upset?' Horse says 'No' Barman says 'Well why the long face?' Horse says 'Because I'm a horse'

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was a busy highway it was hit before making it to halfway.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops