A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

123457

What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

The NBA lockout

what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

girls basketball

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

The white guy did it!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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