What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

thumb_up thumb_down -2

My mother has chlamydia. That's it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -2

two peanuts walked into a bar they both sat down and immediately left once they found out the bar was serving peanuts.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Billy: Hey Timmy, you're so fat your high school picture was an aerial photograph Timmy: Oh yeah? Well you're so fat when you tried to take that photograph the helicopter pilot told you to get out because you're too fat

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the boy afraid of the dark? he was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What do you call cheese that's not your own? A: Someone else's cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy jump in the van? Because his parents had just been in a terrible car accident.... There where 2 fatalities.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Whos there Me Oh, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. Who's There? Timmy. YOU DON'T KNOW ME!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: Why was the man upset? A: He was kidnapped. Two cruel men tied him to a chair in an unknown location. This man was mistaken for someone who was planning to steal a big drug shipment. They beat him unmerciful, shocked him, and hit him in the head with a hammer, and threw him out in the street, with the belief of his death occurring. A driver stopped to help the man into the nearby hospital. The man was questioned about the physical appearance and whereabouts of these criminals. He remembered nothing, and sadly, they got away with this horrible crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Because they're dead, they cant screw in a light bulb. Even if they were alive, it would be highly improbable that a baby could screw in a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops