Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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u smell oh no of wat?? dunno i just know its BADDDDDDD !!!!!! k.c

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

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A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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