A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

Mum makes $97 per hour working online? Offline I can see , but online, mmm pull the other one, it plays lossless codecs

What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

What do you do with a Jewish kid with add( attention deficits disorder)? Send him to a concentration camp

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

What does Yoko Ono say while rehearsing her song before a concert? She gives directions to the band.

Stevan Hawkings walked into a bar. Ohh shit :/

how many Ethiopians can you fit in a bathtub? all of them.

what is the difference between a boy scout and a jew? boy scouts come back from camp.

Can i have a Ice Cream Kuhn?

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

A man said lol, I said lol back. Then he started to beat me up for repeating his phrase!

What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

2 men walk into a bar. You would have expected the second one to notice it after the first guy walked into it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted ti get to to other side. why did the medic cross the road? beacause there was a seriously injured chiken on the side of the road, it had been hit by a fat man on a jog

Why didn't the ice cream cross the road? ??(?/?) ?. (KOREAN)

What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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