What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

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A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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What do you call an African American witch doctor dressed in ceremonial robes flying a plane? A Pilot.

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If your name is coincidentally stated in this text, you will have to pay 200 of your country's currency to the person nearest to you whose first name starts with the letter G. Dexter / Ryan That is all....

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Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a tape worm in your apple.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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Gas prices are so high, I've had to resort to walking and riding my bike.

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What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

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Gary: Hey Bill, wanna hear a joke? Bill: Yes Gary: Okay.

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Why did the teenage boy touch himself at night? Because he was shot in the stomach by his drunken father and was trying in vain to stop the bleeding.

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You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

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Why'd the man walk his dog His pen ran out of ink

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What did the angry asian man do after he crashed his car? He died of serious head trauma and internal bleeding.

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Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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What do you call 4 black guys in a red sleeping bag? Kit Kat. What do you call a fat black guy in a red sleeping bag? Kit Kat Chunky.

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Neil is a reterd.

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What did the homless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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