Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

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Q: What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A: A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam all get on the same flight. About half-way through an engine begins to smoke and stutters to a halt. Fortunately, the pilot has been trained for these situations and lands the aircraft safely.

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poopoo

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your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

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A lil girl walks in to a bar........................ all a sudden a giant purple bunny jump up into her butt... now every time she poops its an easter egg hunt. LBall

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How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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Knock, Knock ...

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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-knock knock! -doors open

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Women. One of the genders a human can be.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops