What did the horse get for Christmas? Starvation and neglect because its owner has been dead for three months of old age and he was a raging, angry, achoholic so no one cared if hey was dead and/or bothered to see if he was alive

"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

What has four legs, yet it can't walk? A dead horse.

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, because if it's black and white, it can't be red.

What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

Weed.

What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

What's the ultimtate guerilla camoflauge at night time? Black people.

Why did the Liberal tell the truth? If one ever does we will have the answer.

In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

wanna hear a better joke? casey.

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Not the case here, though.

What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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