heat!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Beacuse she has no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's There? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are Dead, Voilets are, too Now shut up and say nothing Because we're watching you

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

thumb_up thumb_down -27

When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

thumb_up thumb_down -27

If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did Tarzan say when he saw a herd of Elephants coming over the hill? Oh look, a herd of Elephants coming over the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what did john boner say to the hor that was jewing his laundry want to sex my motherss twat?

thumb_up thumb_down -27

whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

thumb_up thumb_down -27

person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

the blue man livedin the blue house the black man in the black house the white man in the white house but who lived in the white house ,not the white man barack obama

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What ever happened to the bartender that asked, "Why the long face?" He was punched hard on the face for asking a stupid cliche!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

11th September jokes are just plane wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between a red door and a blue door? Fat black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

thumb_up thumb_down -29

everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops