Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why you don't laught when you see a black guy on a scooter? Because it could be your.

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Why did the sperm swim back? cos he realised that he was in someones anus!

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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knock knock Who's there Hi, im a memeber of the Church of Latter Day Saints. Id like to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ

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Why did the pedophile skip breakfast? He said that he would grab a little something on the way to work...

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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Why did the priest fall onto the alter boy? Because he lost his balance

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STOP BULLYING FAT PEOPLE. They have enough on their plate

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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A black man got sentenced go prison for stealing a car. He didn't do it.

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What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

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Koalas mum is a slut

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What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

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A guy walks into a bar and says "ouch!" The bartender says "are you okay?" "Yeah I just stubbed my toe" Then the guy walks it off, and then orders a drink.

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Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

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What does Mr. Newell have? - Diabetes. Mr. Newell has diabetes.

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Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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John: Knock Knock! Bill: Who's there John: John Bill: Oh hey John, come in

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If Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee got in a fight, who would win? Chuck Norris, since Bruce Lee is dead.

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So I was banging this French chick the other day and I couldn't understand what she was saying Turns out I raped her.

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How can you tell if there is an idiot at a dogfight? When someone pits a Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a moron at a dogfight? When someone BETS on the Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a cheater at a dogfight? When the victory goes to the Chihuahua.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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