Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

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How does a bird grow gills if you're riding a peanut. A fridge.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

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A man walks into a bar

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas? Abandoned

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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What happened to the white man who beat up the black man? He was arrested for assault and battery. What happened to the black man who beat up the white man? He was also arrested for assault and battery. Their races have no superiority to the law.

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She was dead.

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

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If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

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What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

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retard

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Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

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What is black and hanging from the tree in my back yard? A tire Swing.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops