A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being raped What's worse than being Raped. Being Raped 2 times by a Giant Scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down

What has seven ears, four legs and two arms? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you get a one handed man out of a tree Wave

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down

What's big and red and if it falls out of a tree and can kill you - a fire truck

thumb_up thumb_down

How many babies can fit in a dumpster? Let's not find out...

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a baby that fell in lava Dead

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than a mentally retarded boy screaming in your ear while your sitting in the waiting room at the doctors? 2 retarded boys screaming in your ears while your sitting in the waiting room at the doctors.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your mother is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being chased by a wolf, who promptly ate the chicken when they arrived at the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops