- Anti Joke

Mind magic for fuck ups: Did you know you can train your dog to magically arrive by saying YOUR name! Just tell it what your name is a lot and voila! Moral: made me laugh, fuck the rest of you XD

knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

A man is in prison and one day his cellmate offers to help him escape. The cellmate tells the man to quickly hide under the covers on his bed and that he'll instruct him further once the security guard passes. The man is then raped. Savagely.

Who was sorry when the fat kid fell over last year? The whole of Japan.

Whats worse then getting caught watching porn? 9/11

Let me tell you this really funny Dane Cook joke.

Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

a blind man walks off a cliff..... he's dead now.

Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he has a serious anger problem.

roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

I treat women like I treat dead bodies. With respect.

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.