HURT

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You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

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why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

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Whats worse than getting an "F" on a test? Stage diving with a kilt on.

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

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What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

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What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

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why did the irishman, the englishman and the african man die? because i went on a violent killing spree, murdering everyone i saw

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A Man thought it was a good day and to go on anti-joke.com then he saw a post that had a link. This man was you and the link was http://minedgamez.tk/beta/ The man then clicked the link and fucking laughed so hard xD. She died in a car crash. Then a pickle appeared. It was then eaten by you not realizing it was actually a hamster.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue... Hold on. Roses could be white too.

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Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

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Whats worse than ten dead babies in one tree? I dont know, but that is quite a graphic sight i have in my mind right now.

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As a stand-up comedian, I've been really interested in how comedians have recovered from jokes not hitting making fun of the fact. Recently, I was in a situation where a rhetorical question didn't hit, and anti-joking (lamenting on the lack of a punchline sarcastically) ended up generating the laugh I needed to move on! Hurray for Anti-jokes! Me: You know the gym Extreme Fitness? Audience: SILENCE Me: (sarcastically) Yes, exactly. That's exactly how that interaction went in my mind when I was practising at home. I ask question - audience responds euphorically - I continue with my joke... http://michaeljagdeo.wordpress.com/2012/01/29/anti-jokes-how-to-recover-when-a-joke-doesnt-hit/

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A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Knock-knock? Who's there? I... I dunno I was planning on thinking of a joke before you said who's there, but I ran out of time.

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Everything I did, Was just a mistake like you.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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