Yo mama so dirty she takes a shower every night

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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How do you fit 1000 babies into a trashcan? You don't that would be wasteful! You Eat Them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Theory: Jesus: Father why must I go die in order to defeat sin, is sin not a product of humans? God: SHHH! You want humans to know they are stronger than us? Real life: Later on the cross Jesus: FATHER WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! God: *Thunder* Moral: Makes sense... Kinda? Maybe? A bit? I honestly do not get it :(

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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What's red and the size of a packet of crisps? A Miscarriage

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What's 9+10 20+1-1-1+2-1-1+1-2+1

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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What is small, green, lives 10 meters under the ground and eat rocks? The little green rock eater!

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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why did the man die? he had cancer

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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so the weather's nice...

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

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Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

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I just found out i have cancer.

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Q:Whats worse, being chased by a chainsaw or being dunked on by LeBron James? A:Since a chainsaw has one of the sharpest metal blades know to mankind, it would be the chainsaw. Although this reguires effort, it is a known fact that Lebron James has been dunked on by some kid at Xaiver, so I would think the chainsaw would hurt more.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

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How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

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A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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