This statement is false.

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How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

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Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

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there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

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Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

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John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

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one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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You suck big fat slobber

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the girl fall down the stairs? Because her asshole brother pushed her :)

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knock knock whos there open the door and find out

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What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

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Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

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What do you call a blonde with a broken arm? A cripple.

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I can be considerate if like someone is burning to death and I was the one considerate enough to lit them on fire... Wait no, I am considerate towards my friends (which are all ladies, all men besides me are obstacles and nothing else) AAAAND my logic processor broke down. Anyway, please do me the honors, take the last message.

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canadians

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An atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!", he said to himself. As he was walking along the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. When he turned to see what the cause was, he saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charging right towards him. He ran as fast as he could. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing, He ran even faster, crying in fear. He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. His heart was pounding and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. At that moment, the Atheist cried out "Oh my God!...." Then the Atheist died a violent and terrible death.

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Some people devote their life to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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What is worse than adolf hitler? Justin beiber

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A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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What is similar to an orange?? A tangerine.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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