What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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haha ur single hahahahahhahahahhahaahahhaahaha i am 2

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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So there's this boy who really love clowns. His room is adorned with circus and clown posters and his one dream is to go to a circus and see a clown. One day he sees an ad in the newspaper for a circus that was headed toward his town. He begged and pleaded to his parents to let him go, and when they finally agreed he was ecstatic. The boy was in awe of all the things that the circus held, elephants, lions, tightrope walkers and trapeze artists, but there was nothing he was more excited for then the main show with the clowns. He took a seat and out came the clown on a unicycle. The boy was having the time of his life, when the clown suddenly called for someone from the audience. The boy immediately ran to the center of the stage. The clown asked the boy "Are you a horse's head?" then held the mic to the boy. "No," he replied. "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" The crowd erupted in laughter and the boy was mortified. He ran out of the circus tent and vowed never to return. He grew up with a hatred for clowns and even had to see multiple therapists. 30 years passed and the boy was now a man. The man looked in his morning paper, only to see that a circus was in town. He decided he would visit one last time. There it was, the elephants and tightrope walkers. And then he saw it, the same clown from 30 years ago in the same show. He walked up and the clown asked the same questions. "Are you a horse's head?" "No." "Are you a horse's mouth?" "No." "Then you must be a horse's BUTT!" Then man the took the microphone from the clown and said, "Screw you clown."

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What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Sarah Palin

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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