How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

What did the baby say to it's mother as it was being thrown in the trash bin? Nothing, it couldn't talk yet.

Wanna know something funny? Your face

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? were lawyers

knock knock who's there interupting black woman interu- MMMMHHHHHMMMM

Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

Why did the chicken cross the street? K

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

What did the man say to the drug dealer? I'd like some drugs

- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Darude- Sandstorm

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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