How do you stop a bus ? Put 3 small children in front of it Whats sad about 3 children who died in a bus crash ? They were my kids. How do you know if you're blind ? You run in to a wall

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A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Dave then complied, opened the door and let the police search his house. He was then found innocent of drug related charges.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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Why did jimmy cross the road? Because that was the direction the cannon was pointing.

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Your mom is so fat that she should watch her weight and maintain a healthy diet.

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the narcoleptic patient? It wasn't. The patients were treated because of moral obligations, but the doctors that laughed were either fired or warned, depending on if they had previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were belongs

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How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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Mullets

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What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

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Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

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A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

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What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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Here's another:

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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Knock knock Come in

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An oriental man starts a new job. He is told to go to the Supply cupboard and bring back some stationery.He is gone far too long so his boss sends another man to see what is going on. The oriental man had a fatal stroke in the supply cupboard and was unfortunately dead.

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why do people play xbox 360's? because there poor people who cant afford a ps3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops