"This is defamation!" proclaimed the Fox, as he sat in the panels of the courtroom. "I attest, with full honesty, Your Honor, that never have I said any of the allegations the two defendants have quoted upon me." He looked with contempt at the Ylvis brothers, who sat at the other end of the room. "I say, Your Honor," he continued, "that I never, ever in my entire life, said 'Gering-ding-ding-dingerdingerding', to which I am willing to testify."

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Why did the mexican immigrant have no friends? He lacked social skills and was unfamiliar with American mannerism's.

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I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

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What did the wife get her husband after they had intercourse? A sandwich, because she loved him and knew he was hungry.

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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Q: what the apple say to the orange? A: nothing because there fruits and fruits cant talk

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a person who will soon die of beeties

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Whats long and black? The unemployment line

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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Wait what? What if you use the what what? Sorry I am still like super hypnotic trippy, dont worry though, I dont want it to end.

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What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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What crawls on the ground and shoots arrows? Legless Legolas.

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''thanks for giving me back the money i lent you david''-said nobody

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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What is better than AIDS? Cancer.Cancer and more cancer

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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