You know how I felt about Nero, no way id ever date anyone but you, back then that is. Fine I will come along, I bet you left the base at "point zero" without the information he left, you have not changed a bit Seth, always too impulsive for your own good, but Nero was always like that and that, turned out, well damn. Tell me first, if you come get me, how much have you really changed mentally from the last time we met? You sincerely sound like a psychopath and I could use a shoulder to cry on rather than be escorted to some sick torture dungeon thing. I gather you are not far away, could you please get over here asap? I do not care about more than the standard code anymore, you have not changed much, except you are a deranged psychopath now, I get it, in your place I think id do the same, I have no idea how bad Nero was doing when you found him, and I sure as hell dont want to know.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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Im cute hehehee

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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What has three legs and herpes? A male prostitute.

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whats purple and brown lucozade sport

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

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How did Barry Bonds break the career homerun record? A combination of natural ability, practice, and a plethora of performance enhancing drugs.

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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