3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

What did the chemist say when his BBQ ran out of charcoal? Nothing interesting.

Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

Your mom is so fat, she got obese and died.

Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

Ed Rambo. EXPERIENCE as John Rambo is kidnapped by AL QUAIDA (because he did not totally save their ass in the second or third movie riiiight) Leaving Ed Rambo, his son (Played by Eddie Murphy) up to the task of saving him, from Al Quaida`s real leader... Yes, its a conspiracy! "Okay, first Obama is supposedly a terrorist, but seriously the secret alliance between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton?" Bullshit movie reviews. "So the explanation is that Ed Rambo is black because John Rambo married an Asian woman? What about their age? They are probably the same or something!" Mad Magazine. Moral: Yeah because this annoys you, and you all kinda love me I know its Al Qaeda, but who wants to type that... Now it does not say Skynet is watching anymore... After four times... Wow, god damn we need robocop to be real before the Termitetrisnators travel back in time into our dimension. AND NOT ADAM SANDLERS: ROBOCOP.

A Canadian man, American man and French man all go to a wive swapping party. The Canadian gets the American's wife, the American gets the French wife, and the Frenchman dies of a brain aneurism and the European wife. is very disappointed in her night.

Once a upon of time, there was 7 dwarfs. Their names are Sleepy, Stupid, Sexy, Shithead, Sonovabitch, Shutup, and Simon. They are a street gang called the 7 dwarfs and was notorious for causing trouble. All the dwarfs got away from the police except for Simon, because that was his real name.

What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

who is gay for wild ones- Ryan Mcgggguigan

What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple that got hit by a bus.

A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

Yo mama's has so much acne, I decided to give her proactive.

roses are red orchids are black I like you best when you lye on your back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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