roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

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You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

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what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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whats the difference between Obama and Romney answer: one would have been a good president instead of a communist

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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Whats sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going off a cliff? A Caddy fits five.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

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what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

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What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

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What do you call it when the sh*t hits the fan? The sh*t hits the fan.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

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What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

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If a chicken and a half layed an egg and a half in a day and a half how many pancakes does it take to shingle a roof? -A banana has no bones

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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