- Anti Joke

A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

Why does the man with no legs call for help? because he woke up to find that he had no legs.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

3 blind mice walk into a bar. they have no idea of their surroundings and are quickly crushed to death.

What's round and red? A red and round solid.

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Why did the blonde walk into the wall? I lied it was nathaniel nugnes

Your mom is so fat, she got obese and died.

What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

What did the chemist say when his BBQ ran out of charcoal? Nothing interesting.

How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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