What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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A man buys free health care...

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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You wanna hear a real joke? Well, look at the post below this one.

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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Dont look at me.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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69

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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What do you call a black guy going into mcdonalds A great opportunity to make a raciest joke

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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