What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? The doctor prescribes him tablets to treat his bi-polar tendencies.

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School

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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What do blacks and the night have in common? Their both worse than when it's light

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If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

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Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

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If you rape a prostitute is it shop lifting?

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How many times has Belle Ahern been hit in the mutt 76. Stupid slut

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why did the man fart? because he felt like it.

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Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

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politically correct!

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I had a great joke to tell you. I didn't want people stealing my ideas so I didn't write it. Haha

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What did Helen Keller say to Michael Jordon before she died? Nothing...

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what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

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roses are red violets are blue we're having sex cause i'm stronger than you

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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Yesterday I saw a black kid outrun a white kid know why? Because the white kid was a cripple

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A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

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My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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