rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

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A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? because 7 brutally beat and raped 9

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

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No deal, blind trust and I help you, or no friendship, and certainly no reason to help you.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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civil rights

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Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Womens rights.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down the hill. what black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him.

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How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

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Did you know that I can't talk any louder than this... Exept when I can

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Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

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Whats long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops