Why were trash man's hands dirty? He got shot in the leg and desperately tried to get the bullet out with his hands and got blood all over them and ass he was running to the hospital he tripped into shit.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

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Q: How do you make babies cry? A: Throw a brick at it's face.

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what is the difference between coke and pepsi? -they are competing soft drinks made by different brands

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david your girlfriend has a nice ass

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Why was the girl crying on the busy street? She was naked.

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good one jess !!

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What's black, white, and red all over? The flag of the Arapaho Nation.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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what do you tell a woman with one black eye? "sorry about that wild ball, you played a fantastic softball game otherwise"

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what do you call a joke that is not a joke? not a joke

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to boys are playing football 1 ses pass tje over ses pass wot

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

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What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

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Chuck Norris can count from 1 to 100... twice!

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what happens if you set micheal jackson on fire nothing he is 6 feet under incased in concrete if he wasnt hed melt

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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Question: How did the chicken get to the other side of the road? Answer: Too find his joint.

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A man finds a mysterious lamp on the side of the road. He picks it up, rubs it, and sells the lamp at a pawn shop for $10,000. The man paid off his credit card debt and was happy that he did not have to file for bankruptcy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops