What did the Cow say to the Chicken? Nothing animals cant talk

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How do you suppress a black hole? Surround it with white holes

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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What do you call a pig and a ball when u come across both of them? A ball hog!

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How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

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Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

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Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

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A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a protocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "We don't serve their kind here! They'll have to wait outside. We don't want them here." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Listen, why don't you wait out by the speeder. We don't want any trouble."

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There's a black, afghan, and a rhabi. Which one is Obama?

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A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

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if a chcken lays an eggg what happens? a baby bird comes out

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm schizophrenic. And so am I!

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What's worrying about a middle-eastern man on a plane? The fact you are worrying about it.

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Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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Roey Jegen

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A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Earlier that morning the farmer's daughter had inadvertently left the gate to the yard open as she was preoccupied by her worry over a maths test set for that day. She hadn't studied for the test as she was still deeply distressed over her fathers recent heart attack. This, coupled with the added burden of household chores now delegated to her because her mother was out trying to get the west field prepared for sowing, had made her quite forgetful and distracted of late. Whilst several chickens escaped, only one strayed so far that it actually encountered the road facing the farm. After crossing the road and gorging itself in a soy-bean crop, the chicken was struck by a furniture remover's van as it attempted to make its way home. Several hours later the dead chicken was spotted by a Community Mental Health Worker who was doing his bi-weekly rural clinic run. The chicken, being a bantam, caught the eye of the Mental Health worker, who was a keen trout fisherman. "Cool" thought the mental health worker- "those feathers will make for excellent trout flies". He stopped and plucked a handful of the most iridescent blue, green and orange feathers and placed them in an envelope. He rolled himself a cigarette, sat on the trunk of his car and admired the clouds. "God, I love this job", he muttered to no one in particular.

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? I like Pie. I like Pie who? What do you mean who? Pie isn't a person, it's a thing.

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Q: What genre is the bible? A: Si-fi

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A seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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