What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

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SUBway eat fresh ZOMbies eat fleash

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once upon a time there was a cripple little girls who lived in an orfanage were she got raped then beat .

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What us black and white and read all over The newspaper

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

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What happens when a jew with a boner runs into a wall? He hurts his face.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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Why did the black man die of leukemia? Overexposure to radioactive materials due to his career as a nuclear engineer.

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What is the diffrence between a monkey... An apple because the more the much. :) :| :| :|

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Q: What's blue and smells like grass? A: Blue grass.

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What's worse than losing one of your socks? Being jewish during the holocaust

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

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A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, a bus hit it half way along and it died instantly.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

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A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because he had an undescended testicle

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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What is the difference between a rat and an italian? nothing.

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Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

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What is yellow and corny? Corn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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