why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

why did the boy trip off a cliff? because he was clumsy.

we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

Let's go burn down an orphanage, what are they gonna do tell their parents?

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

Why did the moogle cross the road? Kupo kupo kupopo!

Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

what did the boy say? please please please please goout with me

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

What's gray and comes in buckets? An elephant

baby seal walks into a club

What's black and hangs from a rope on a tree in my backyard? A tire swing.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

My thanks to those that thumb down my comment below, you have the possibilty to become one of my over 100.000.000 members, as long as you follow your heart, your own will, we got you covered. We got over 600.000 never members since last year, you are far from alone, thumb this comment up, leave a small comment, and I shall send one of my shadows to tell you more, or online if you prefer that, but then I would need your email address... ...As for your home address? Nah, already know it just let me know if you want a visit, but during my 6000 years on earth or so, I have yet to evolve to the point where I fully understand the full nature of computers, they are very recent to me. Yet only those that are willing to follow their hearts and enact their true hidden desires without shame, guilt, remorse, but instead with love and gusto, will find the answers among us. Soon my wings shall spread, and just like that, the world is ours! Moral: "Fuck Morals, would you believe me if I said they where in code? No they are not, the secrets are only within the shadows, and the Black Angel. Nero.

How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What else is new?

Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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