What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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You know what's bad? Running over a baby with a truck. You know what's worse? Skidding on it.

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the meaning of life is too burn calories so I burnt a fat kid?

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AIDS

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday

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Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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What do you call a black man with a hoe? A farmer.

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I just can't stand sitting down!

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Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I told you she was my Mom, but that didn't stop you!

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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96

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

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Santa isn't real

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What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

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If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

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What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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Friends are a lot like snow You pee on them, they disappear

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Knock knock. who's there? Alex. GO AWAY!!!

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you know whats funny the letter Q

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What do you call an Irish man with no legs? Handicapped

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A policeman walks into a bar. He goes inside to greet his friend who happens to be the bartender. Another man walks into the bar. This man is a regular customer and goes to the bar almost every other night. The policeman leaves and goes back on duty.

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Why wasn't there an elevator in the rainforest? The rainforest is not capable of managing an elevator because an elevator does in fact require an energy source which is also not capable in a rainforest. The rainforest is filled with animals and is not filled with humans which would make having an elevator in the rainforest useless because the main use of an elevator is to transport humans. The animals in the rainforest would not be able to operate the elevator because using an elevator for them would be advance while humans using elevators is second nature.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops