A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer-pressure.

Mexicans are like waffles

If file gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being shot repeatedly in the chest.

Why did the girl die? She read Twililght

Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know your mother is a skank.

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

Why did the black man shoot the white man? The white man was a prison escapee attempting to perform hate crimes toward African Americans by reforming the KKK. The black man was also schizophrenic.

So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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