Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why couldn't the 1 year old talk? It's a 1 year old, idiot, it can't!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A boy asks his teacher to go to the bathroom, she says ok but only if he can sya the alphabet. He says ok, but for some reason skips the letter P. How come? -Because he has a sever learning disability and is having a hard time remebering all the letters of the alphabet

thumb_up thumb_down +35

This one time at band camp....

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's worse than aids? Super aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I share two rooms with my mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I tell an anti joke!.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

I was (really) asked one day by a guy if I wanted to star in a porn movie... Before I could even think about it he asked my 14 year old sister "Do you want to join in too?" And that kids, is why I am stuck in jail for pushing up a boot up a guys ass... Well replace boot with dick, and guys ass with my 14 year old sister and yeah... Naw... seriously she has hueg boobs though... at the age of 14, damn those melons have not even gone a bit greenish yellow and they are still growing... ...Hey Cassandra, its NeroMetal, good thing I am not your brother and that you are 19 right? NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH THAT NEROISM DUDE THAT CHATS HERE, I play videogames, and write books, and sign books... ...Then some guy sees my real name is Nero and goes that guy on horsehead network? Who? HE SUCKS! SUCKS ASS!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

pickle sniffer

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you stop the unstoppable You dont

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q. What is a brown cow called? A. A cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the jewish man pick up a nickel on the street? Because he understands the value of saving money.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Where did the moon get its degree? Unfortunately, they haven't installed any colleges for planetary satellites yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops