Once upon a time, there was a pair of headphones. It loved the sound of music.

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Three guys are in the desert. They find a lamp, they rub it, and a genie appears. The genie says "I'll grant each of you a wish." So the first guy says "I want to return to my family in my native country." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The second guy says "I want to live in Hollywood, be famous and rich, and have dozens of girls around me." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The third guy says "I want to go to Hawaii." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. So all three guys end up being happy.

Hitler had the right ideas, wne tupon it the wrong way.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 new what 6 and 9 were doing.....

How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks... ...into an alleyway to have a quick smoke before entering the bar his friends went in.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars except the duck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock Knock, Who's There The Chicken

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

Q: Why was Sally sad? A: Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels for the loss of their newborn child.

Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

What did Lebron James say to Brad Pitt? "What's up, Brad?"

how do you teach a baby to walk? cut of its hands.

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How do you make lady gaga angry? punch her in the face and throw her off a cliff

A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice carton? She was trying to read the nutrition label and had forgotten her reading glasses.

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. jack fell down and broke his crown, and is now in intensive care.

mitchell likes balls in his mouth.

whats funny? small ginger girls who die there head red, then it turns ginger again

Why did the black guy fail his math test? Because he did not study enough and as a result was no prepared to take a test on that material.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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