What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

what do you call a half dead black person crawling across your lawn..............................stop laughing and reload

Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

What happened when the paraplegic man went into the bar? Nothing the man couldnt get into the bar because the bar has no wheelchair ramp.

yeyeyeyeye live action

What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

A little boy walks up to his father and asks him a question, "Daddy, how are babies born?" His father then replies in an enthusiastic manner, "You see, I stuck my dick in your mom's vag and started pounding. Apparently two condoms defeat the purpose."

What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

A guy walks into a bar and says "ouch!" The bartender says "are you okay?" "Yeah I just stubbed my toe" Then the guy walks it off, and then orders a drink.

I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

Simon says.. Nothing because he is deaf, so therefor he would have to sign it to you.

Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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