Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

Here come the elephants over the hill!

roses are red violets are blue I'm ADHD oh look, a squirrel

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

speech and debate.

Why did the kid take the trash out to the movies? Because his mum said take out the trash

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

- knock knock. - Who's There? - Steve. - Steve who? - Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

Whats an Anit-joke?? A joke that possesses the kind of humor based on the surprise factor of absence of an expected joke or of a punch line in a narration which is set up as a joke.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

Knock knock Who's there? Prosti Prosti who? Prostitute

Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

Q: What do you call a black guy with his degree in dentistry? A: Doctor

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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