How do you break up with a guy? you kick him in the nuts.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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I had a submarine.... once

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"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

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what do you call a Puerto Rican with no arms? Trust worthy

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Why did the guy in the wheelchair die? He was mauled by tigers.

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A family has been forced out of their house by ghosts. Who are they gonna call?... Their insurance company.

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whats the difference between a black rapist and a white rapist? the black rapist is black

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A pterodactyl walks into a bar, bartender says "What'll you have." To which the pterodactyl graciously replies "RAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR." Because pterodactyl's do not speak English.

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So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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What is x + 12 That is impossible because you can't add letters

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

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How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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Why did the housewife become a farmer? Because the kitchen was burned down in a horrific accident.

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops