What do you call a 400 pound man eating chocolate? diabetic

What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

A. Knock, Knock B. Come in

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 7 ate 9.

your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

A girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

I'm trying to see from Adam Fantuzzi's point of view but i cant stick my head that far up my arse Daniel

Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

420

Knock knock Go fuck yourself

what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

So there's this crazy married couple in a old trailer down the road. They are both drunk. The man asks his blond wife, ''Isn't it about time we get married?'' The wife replies ''I wouldn't marry a ugly thing like you!'' The next day, they file a divorce.

What's big and messy? A big mess

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? WE'VE SAID THIS WAY TOO MANY TIMES YOU SHIT

Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...