A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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What came first: the chicken or the egg? God.

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Why did Billy start crying? Becuase he's fat and stupid and noboy loves him

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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Seen the new batman movie? [spoiler] the audience dies

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Why did it suck to be a black jew during the Holocaust? cause you had to go to the back of the oven

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Your mom walks into a bar.

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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Am I the boss.No I was just offered the job

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Jake: "Guys Apple's new phone is going to be curved." Bob: "Who makes curved phones?" Jake: "Apple."

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69

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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Q. How much wood would a Wood-Chuck chuck if a Wood-Chuck could chuck wood? A. Wood-Chuck's clearly cant chuck would so what is the point of trying to figure out a question that would never take place in real life?

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If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

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knock knock your nana had a cardiac arrest and thankfull dead now

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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