What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

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What did the chilean guy told to the other chilean guy? Hola!

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a Jew? Boyscouts come back from camp.

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Who're you gonna' call when you're apartments being ravaged by ghosts? Your doctor, for you might have schizophrenia.

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How come fat people drive cars? It takes to long to ride a bike to McDonalds

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What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They were caucasian artists.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

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If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

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why did ben perve on the 5 year old girl he is a pedofile

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Wait your turn patiently.

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Roses are red violets are blue why dont u go take a shower

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Why didn't the teacher ask where Billy's assignment was? Because Billy died last week. -B

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They are both are fat and have beards, except for Tom Cruise.

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Three bears take a bath Red bear asks for the shampoo Blue bear wants the soap Wait... That's not a joke, that's a Haiku

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A fat mexican man runs a marathon. Later, he is hit by a bus and raped by a squirrel.

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1unno;njfjk

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F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

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Whats worse that stubbing your toe? Death.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

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What did one Pokemon say to the other pokemon? We are fake.

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Yo momma's so nice that she baked cookies for us. Please tell her I said thanks.

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A man walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken I don't see anything funny about this at all. -Tag

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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