What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

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I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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Your mom.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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The.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

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whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

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What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops