- Anti Joke

1134

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

Obama 2012

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment. Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

Runescape.

What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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