Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

A man walks around a bar.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

Your mom is so...wonderful.

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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