What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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Canada

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

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Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a skank.

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what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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