An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

Womens rights

What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

LOL -LOL GUY

Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

Diana and victoria

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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